Sunday, December 6, 2009

I've Got Someone You Really Need To Meet

Here's a fun game to play at your next holiday party.

Let's say somebody corners you. You're up against the fridge or a wall and a very kind but overly verbose and socially awkward guest traps you with a wall of words. Your glass is full of wine. You don't smoke. Your phone isn't ringing. You've got nothing. No way out. And that's when a friend comes within five feet of you.

It's only polite, then, to introduce your buddy and duck the hell out.

That happened to me twice last night. Both times I happened to be walking past somebody who sucked me in by saying, "Oh Jeremy, this is so-and-so. Have you met?" By the time I'd said no, I don't think we have, the friend was gone. Nowhere to be found.

There should be some sort of point system set up for this. One point for an awkward conversation tag out. Two points if you're able to successfully deflect and bounce away, unconversed.

I'm sorry. I know this is the season of giving and all. And I really need some sort of redeeming way of finishing up what I'm saying. But first, hey, have you met my friend here?